Saturday, July 24, 2010

Saturday, July 24, 2010

This weekend has brought tears, laughter, happiness, joy, confusion....just an array of feelings.

I had been wanting to see that movie Inception. Matthew had seen it and loved it. But, I didn't want to go by myself so I really didn't think I would go. But while with Dawn one evening this week we talked about the movie and she said that she wanted to go also. As we were parting, I briefly mentioned that if they went Friday night I would like to go along. (They usually would go out as a family on Friday night). Yeah I thought I would probably feel like the third wheel, but I really wanted to go...and not alone. I didn't think they would go, or if they did, I certainly didn't think that they would consider me....they have enough going on also.

But, sure enough, she called and asked! I had talked to Jay and Marilyn in that time and Jay said he had wanted to see it also. I thought it would be Dawns family and Jay and I. As it turned out it was Dawn, Mark, Jay and myself. I had a great time. I don't know if Jay really wanted to see it, or if he knew my thoughts of being a third wheel and helping me not to feel that. But we all had fun...even though the movie was very hard for us to understand.

I know the Lord put it all together. When I came home from our vacation I felt like I had a new breathe...a new lease on life. I am reading a book about being a single mom, and I am finding that just worrying about the kids is helping no one...not even them. I have praying for God to help me with this. I feel like God is moving me into the next step of my grieving process, my growing process in this journey I am on.

Then, something I absolutely loved to do before was work in the yard during the summer. But, we would usually do that together. But, I just hadn't been able to get motivated to go out there. To do it alone. But today, I started out by doing a little thing...just trimming bushes..but by the end of the day I had accomplished so much and had found that I had spent the majority of the day outside....and I absolutely enjoyed it...again! Thank you Jesus for giving me the joy again!!!

I just wanted to share this. It was a good day! Thank you Jesus!!

Saundra

3 comments:

Kari Moroz said...

Still just loving you and your sweet kids. I know that God is working in you so much, I can read the joy in your posts! This is just such wonderful news, and I pray that He will continue to lead you.

Anonymous said...

Glad you had a good day, have a good Sunday. Pat Mc

Anonymous said...

Saundra,

Praise God for the healing that is taking place in your life! I'm so incredibly happy for you! And for your kids! God is not only healing you but your family. I remember fearing our family would fall apart when Steve died, but we are stronger than ever because of all we've gone through together. I'm still praying for you and I will send you a text!
Love,
Eva